Friday, May 27, 2011

Ancient Evenings, Norman Mailer

Really Norman? An anal and incest fetishist's interpretation of the whole Osiris myth? Not only is that disrespectful to Egyptians, but obscene to people who care about mythology. I didn't care to read it long enough to find out if Menenhetet was just putting his own filthy twist on the myth, or if Norman really thought it was ok to have their Gods corn-holing each other just because Egyptian pharaohs wanted to keep their genes pure by copulating with their own family. This ghastly choice of context only reiterates his own twisted psychology. Holly was right, dude has issues... many many issues. 

Gave it an extra star for the style. 

Monday, May 16, 2011

Collected Poems 1947-1980, Allen Ginsberg

When he’s not writing about big cocks and homosexual exploits while stoned out of his mind, Allen Ginsberg’s surreal poetry is as enchanting as magical cake. Cross-country traveler, all-encompassing pantheist, anti-imperialist radical, extremely eccentric metaphorical associations. Ginsberg and I come from the same planet, and it’s probably not Earth. Right now, he might be my favorite poet, but I haven’t read much poetry, so that’s likely to change. 

About the poems: let me say that while Howl was deeply moving and spoke for an entire generation, I think Wichita Vortex Sutra- a powerful critique against the storms of industrialization and the Viet Nam War, using the Great Plains of Middle America as an allegorical backdrop for the vortex of Kali Yuga- earns an equal stake as masterpiece. Contrary to a lot of opinions that suggest his work in the 50s was the best, I think in the late 60s he really hit his stride, mostly due to world events and the cultural gravitation to his personality traits. Most of his poems from the early 60s and late 70s are highly homoerotic. It seemed like he couldn’t write a poem without at least one reference to his dick. Plus, they didn’t flow very well, possibly due to a high amount of puffin’ the magic dragon. 

 

My top Ginsberg beats: 

Psalm II 

Hymn 

After Dead Souls 

Siesta In Xbalba 

Howl 

Sunflower Sutra 

Europe! Europe! 

Lysergic Acid 

Man’s Glory 

Wichita Vortex Sutra 

Bayonne Entering NYC 

A Vow 

Holy Ghost on the Nod Over the Body of Bliss 

An Open Window on Chicago 

Wales Visitation 

Pentagon Exorcism 

Chicago To Salt Lake by Air 

Past Silver Durango Over Mexic Sierra-Wrinkles 

Friday The Thirteenth 

Thoughts Sitting Breathing 

Mind Breaths 

Plutonian Ode 

Friday, May 6, 2011

Top NBA Teams from 1994-2010

  1.  1. 1996 Chicago Bulls 

 
The addition of Dennis Rodman made the 1996 Bulls one of the best defensive teams of all time.  With Rodman banging down low and Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, and Ron Harper probably the best perimeter defense ever.  They were also the best rebounding team I’ve ever seen, and rebounds are the most key thing to being a great team.  Offensively they could get stagnant, but even when they weren’t blowing out teams, Michael Jordan would put the team on his back and take over offensively.  They famously went 72-10 in the regular season and in the playoffs 16-3, with losses to the Knicks and the Sonics twice in the NBA finals. 

 
2.  2008 Boston Celtics 

 
The only reason they aren’t number 1 is because they went 16-9 in the playoffs. They were the best defensive team I’ve ever seen, even better than the '96 Bulls.  They played phenomenal, unselfish team basketball that advocated passing and communication.  At times they were too unselfish.  Kevin Garnett led them with the kind of spirit you'd expect from a general.  Ray Allen’s presence on the court freed up Paul Pierce to work his top notch one-on-one game.  The other starters and bench players played their roles perfectly.  They went 66-16 in the regular season, and in the playoffs they accomplished some of the most lopsided victories in playoff history, including a manhandling of the Hawks in game 7 of the first round, and the unforgettable 131-92 blowout of the Lakers to close out the finals- an NBA finals record for largest margin of victory. 

 
3. 2001 Los Angeles Lakers 

 
Despite going 56-26 in the regular season, they tied the record for best playoffs winning percentage at 16-1. The reason for this was Shaq came into the season out of shape, but after the all star break he became the familiar dominating center we all expected from him. Kobe Bryant entered his prime and played the best basketball of his career. He wasn’t as selfish as he was before, and he seemed to be even quicker, blinding opponents as he made his way to the rim. Kobe and Shaq were in my opinion the greatest duo in NBA history. They were both in their prime and so were the role players - Robert Horry, Derrick Fisher, and Rick Fox. They all played lazy defense to start the year, but later they picked it up when it mattered most, and when it mattered most they were virtually unbeatable. The reason they are 3 is because there weren’t many elite teams in the league that year. The best record in the league was only 58-24 from the Spurs, who they swept in 4 games to 0. 

 
4. 2010 Los Angeles Lakers 

 
I was surprised when the offensive minded, finesse Lakers won the NBA championship last year. Normally a defense-oriented team wins. That’s not to say they didn’t play good defense- they did when it mattered. This team was so hard to beat because they had 3 talented guys in the front court that could score, block shots, and rebound. Not to mention Kobe Bryant, who was becoming legendary for closing out games with winning shots. They won it again this year in an intense game 7 series against the same Celtics team that they faced three years ago. The reason I don't rank them higher than the 2008 Celtics is because the Celtics didn't have key rebounder Kendrick Perkins in game 7 (and they got killed on the glass that game), the core Celtics three were older & slower than in 2008, and they had a lead against this Lakers team in the 4th quarter when some questionable calls put the Celtics in the penalty early, setting up a Lakers comeback. This game was IN Los Angeles, and in 2008 the final game was in Boston, and the Celtics blew that team out. Granted, Bynum was hurt in 2008, but with that margin of victory the Celtics still would have won- even with the addition of Ron Artest on defense, although this would have made it a very close series in 2008. 

 
5. 1999 & 2005 San Antonio Spurs 

 
The Spurs were so boring to watch but they played such fundamentally intelligent basketball. Comparing the 1999 to 2005 Spurs, it’s difficult to solve which is better. In 2005 Duncan was in his prime, Manu and Parker created havoc when they penetrated, and their defense along with Bruce Bowen was very good. But in 1999 David Robinson was there, dubbing him and Duncan the twin towers. They also had some great perimiter shooting in Sean Elliot and Avery Johnson. That team went 16-2 in the playoffs! but the league was weak that year. The 2005 team went 16-6 and the league was much better, particularly in the finals when they met their match against the Pistons. If I had to pick it would be the 2005 team because they played better perimeter defense and they also had Manu Ginobili & Robert Horry killing off opponents with clutch shooting. 

 
6. 2005 Detroit Pistons. 

 
The 2005 finals went down to the wire. The Pistons and Spurs were evenly matched. It's possible that the Pistons might have won had game 7 been in Detroit, but in my gut I feel the Spurs were truly better. Both defenses were the two best in the league, but the Spurs were marginally better offensively. This team was better than the 2004 championship winning team because of the acquisition of Antonio McDyess. Also, the players had better chemistry since they'd all been playing together a year longer than in 2004. 
 
7. 1996 Sonics 

 
My team! Gary Payton and Shawn Kemp were the fastest, most flamboyant duo in league history. Their athleticism propelled the Sonics to a 64-18 record and a breeze through the playoffs, but unfortunately they would meet the greatest team of the era in the playoffs- the 1996 Bulls. That being said, the real reason that they get as high as 7 is because they gave the Bulls a scare in the finals when no one else even came close. They even won by 21 in game game 4, amazing considering the Bulls had the largest average margin of victory in league history at about 12. 

 
8. 2006 Miami Heat 

 
Dwayne Wade’s memorable performance in the finals made this team great, but there isn’t anything particular that stands out with this team to make me think they crack the top 7. Shaquille O’neal was becoming a veteran, and veterans were something that team was not short of. They got lucky facing a mentally weak Mavericks team that only seemed to be on a vendetta against the Spurs when they played perfectly to beat them in the Western Conference finals. 

 
9. 1997 Utah Jazz 

 
They also went 4-2 against the Bulls in the finals, this time in 1997, but for several reasons the 1996 Sonics are better: the Bulls weren’t as good as 1996. They *only* went 69-13 and 16-4 in the playoffs. MJ, Scottie, and Rodman were all a fraction slower! Also, the 1996 and 1997 Jazz were virtually the same team, and the Sonics beat them 4 games to 3 in the 1996 Western Conference finals, so that’s my reasoning there. However, they were a great team. They had the most efficient offense of all time with John Stockton and Karl Malone in their late prime. The team shot over .500 as a whole, unheard of! 

 
10. 2004 Indiana Pacers 

 
They lost to the Pistons in the 2004 Eastern Conference finals in a memorable series. It was the lowest scoring series in NBA history because both teams had the best defenders in the league. The Pacers were the second best team that year. 

 
Honorable mentions. 

 
In 1994, the final 8 teams were all very evenly matched and the playoff excitement is what got me into basketball.  5 out of 7 series went 7 games! The Rockets ended up winning the finals. It’s unbelievable that the Sonics, who had the best record at 63-19, didn’t make the final 8. It goes to show how competitive the league was that year. 

 
1995 Orlando Magic. Shaq dominated the middle and opened up all the dynamic 3 point shooters they had. This was probably the best offensive team of the 90s. 

 
2000 Portland Blazers. They were well rounded with seasoned veterans, but they were just too slow and ran out of gas against the Lakers every year. 

 
2002 Sacramento Kings. The Kings gave the Lakers their biggest challenge during their threepeat from 2000-2002. They had the league’s best record and lost to them in a 7 game series, although this game was clearly tainted by officiating. 

 
2006 Dallas Mavericks. It’s too bad they choked, otherwise they make the top 10. 

 
2008 Cleveland Cavaliers. They came the closest to defeating the Celtics that year. Their series went to game 7 and it was close, but they just couldn’t take the lead. 

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